WHAT IS NLP AND WHY IT WORKS

By Daniela Fukumothi · April 2026

If coaching is the conversation, NLP is the magic behind it.

The first books about NLP were actually called The Structure of Magic — Volume I and II.

When I first heard about Neuro-Linguistic Programming, I thought it sounded like something between woo-woo and a complicated technical field in computing. Then I studied it, experienced it. And then I practiced the techniques — and watched people improve their state in 45 minutes.

That was the moment I knew. This is real. This works. And more people need to know about it.

What does NLP actually mean?

Neuro — how your brain processes the world.

Linguistic — the language you use to make sense of it.

Programming — the patterns you run, mostly without realising.

Put it together and you get this: NLP is the study of how the words we use, and the way we think, shape our experiences, our emotions and our results.

Or as Richard Bandler, one of its creators, put it: "NLP is an attitude and a methodology, which leaves behind a trail of techniques."

And Robert Dilts, who helped develop it further, said simply: "NLP is whatever works."

The best way to understand NLP? A story.

NLP is best felt rather than explained. But I love this story from Joseph O'Connor's book — summarised here:

A boy asks his mother what NLP is.

The mother tells him to first go ask the grandfather how his arthritis is today.

The grandfather replies that it is bad, it is hurting a lot — and makes a painful face.

The boy goes back, and the mother tells him to ask one more question.

So the boy asks: "Grandfather, what was the funniest thing I did when I was younger?"

The grandfather's face lights up. He starts telling stories, pausing to laugh, remembering details with joy and attention.

The boy goes back to the mother. And she says:

"You changed how he felt with a few words. That's NLP."

Why I use NLP in every session

NLP isn't a separate thing I offer. It's woven into everything I do.

When a client is stuck in a story that no longer serves them — NLP helps reframe it.

When someone can't access their confidence — NLP helps anchor it.

When a belief is quietly blocking all progress — NLP helps shift it at the root.

Combined with coaching and hypnotherapy, NLP is part of what I call the SPA framework — working with your State, your Perspective and your Agenda to create real, lasting change.

You don't need to understand how it works to feel the difference. You just need to be open to the conversation.

And if you're reading this thinking "that sounds interesting but I'm not sure it's for me" — that's exactly what the discovery session is for. 🌿

→ Book your free discovery session

TAGS: NLP · COACHING · MINDSET · PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT · STATE